巴黎雷歐《情緒管理十二講》第十二講 樂趣和成功之間的差距 [原創(chuàng)]

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巴黎雷歐《情緒管理十二講》第十二講 樂趣和成功之間的差距 [原創(chuàng)]

第十二講 樂趣和成功之間的差距

如今人們公開談?wù)摮晒ΑＮ艺J為，社會在每個不同的時代都有它的主流話題，所以我們生活的時間是成功的最佳時機。我們在中世紀的祖先并沒有成功的奢侈。原因很簡單，你出生于農(nóng)民，你最終可能會死于一個農(nóng)民的身份。

工業(yè)革命后，情況開始好轉(zhuǎn)。舊世界悄然離開，新秩序走上舞臺。然而，在短暫的春天之后不久，戰(zhàn)爭爆發(fā)了，到處都是。那時最常見的命運是你出生在一個小商人的家庭里，你接受了良好的教育，準備去你父親的公司。然后不知怎的，你最后被一把機關(guān)槍擊中，然后死在了法國的無名戰(zhàn)壕里。

這看起來夠糟的了？哦，好吧，在大戰(zhàn)結(jié)束后的幾十年里，歐洲和全世界都認為，一場戰(zhàn)爭是不夠好的，讓我們再來一場。

所有這些都意味著，在社交上取得成功在當時并不是一個時髦的話題，因為時間和環(huán)境并沒有為這種事情的發(fā)生提供任何舞臺。只有在民主和相當穩(wěn)定的和平時期之后，一種文化才能夠從生存、粉碎敵人轉(zhuǎn)移到關(guān)注個人的成功上來。

快進到今天，我們到處討論成功，與朋友在酒吧，在電視談話節(jié)目里，在互聯(lián)網(wǎng)上等等。有一個共同的信念，說你必須享受你所做的事情的樂趣，才能成功。我認為這個觀點本身沒有任何問題，但我覺得其中存在一個廣泛的誤解。

我認為有樂趣，玩得開心，是我們生存的基礎(chǔ)，也是所有人類活動的終極動力之一。許多有影響力的人也一直強調(diào)這一點：為了獲得成功，你需要從一開始就對自己所做的事情有樂趣。但問題是，許多人把它作為成功的手段，而它僅僅是一個先決條件。

這會導(dǎo)致問題。你渴望取得巨大的成功。當覺得時間合適時，你根據(jù)自己喜歡做的事情啟動你的項目，然后試著每天都努力地向前推進。幾天、幾個月、幾年過去了，你仍然是一個“業(yè)余愛好者”， 而不是那些在這個領(lǐng)域做得非常專業(yè)的人。為什么？其中一個主要的原因是，興趣和娛樂心態(tài)只能激勵你走出完美的第一步，玩得開心，興趣滿足了，你總是在重復(fù)這個完美的第一步，而不是在你的項目中實際向前邁進，最終幾乎沒有什么實際的收效。

享受成功的果實，需要兩個要素：興趣和才能。前者將一個人拖入活動中，后者使他能夠高調(diào)開始，并且隨著時間的推移變得越來越有激情。然而，要想成功地完成同樣的活動，我們需要更多、更多的東西，額外的成分，譬如分析性思維和面向技術(shù)的研究。

生活中有很多例子來證實這一點。以美術(shù)為例，它需要一種創(chuàng)造性思維才能發(fā)現(xiàn)并展現(xiàn)出創(chuàng)造力和獨創(chuàng)性。然而，需要利用分析和技術(shù)精神來實施這些發(fā)現(xiàn)和原始創(chuàng)造。這種“大師頭腦”正是在他或她的職業(yè)生涯中，由街頭畫家走向國家博物館的原因。簡而言之，一個有創(chuàng)造力的人發(fā)現(xiàn)并享受樂趣，繼而以一種分析和技術(shù)的精神來利用這些發(fā)現(xiàn)，并向成功邁出腳步。

最后的建議是，你可以既有創(chuàng)造力又善于分析，你最好兩者兼而有之。

The gap between having fun and being successful

Nowadays people openly talk a lot about success. I turn to think that a society has its trending topic in each different era. So the time we are living in is the best time for success talk. Our ancestors in medieval days did not have the luxury of success. The reason was quite simple, your born a peasant and you probably die a peasant.

After the industrial revolution, things started to get better. The old world quietly left the stage to new order. However, not long after the brief spring, the war broke out everywhere. At that time the most common fate would be that you were born to a family of a small business man. You received decent education and was about to take your father’s company. Then somehow, you ended up being shot by a machine gun and then died in the trench in the middle of nowhere in France.

This looked bad enough? Oh well, in the following decades after the big war, Europe and the world decided that, one war was not good enough. Let’s have another one.

All this is to say, being socially successful couldn’t really be a trendy topic back in the days as the time and circumstances did not provide any stage for this to happen. It is only after democracy and a fairly stable period of peace, a culture can then shift its focus from surviving, crushing their enemies to focusing on individual success.

Fast forward to now, we discuss success everywhere, in bars with friends, on TV in talk shows, on the internet, etc. There’s a common belief says that you have to be having fun in what you do, in order to succeed. I don’t have a problem with this statement per se, but there’s a broad misunderstanding about this to my opinion.

I do think to have fun is the basis of our existence and one of the ultimate motors of all human activities. So many influencers also emphasize it all the time: in order to be successful, you need to have fun in what you do from the very beginning. The problem though, is that many people take it as the means to success, whereas it is simply just a prerequisite.

This would result in problems. You craved for huge success. When the time felt right, you launched your project based on the thing you love doing the most and then trying to push forward each day. Days, months, years went by, you are still a “hobbyist” comparing to someone who has made it professionally in this field. Why? One of the main reasons is having fun and be motivated for what you do is just the first step. It is hardly any good or productive to repeat this first step to perfection instead of actually moving forward in your project.

To have fun in doing something specific, we need mainly two things: interest and talent. The former drags a person into the activity and the latter enables him to start on high note and grow more and more passionate with time. However, to succeed big in doing the same activity, we need something more, way more. The additional ingredients would be analytical thinking and technical oriented research.

There’re so many examples in life to depict this. Take fine art as example, it takes a creative mind to discover and bring out that creativity and originality. However, it takes an analytical and technical spirit to capitalize on this discoveries and primitive creations. This “master mind” is what brings that street painter to national museum over the years of his or her career. To make it short, a creative minds discover and have fun. Then it takes an analytical and technical spirit to capitalize the discoveries and take one step further to success.

The final take away is, you can be both creative and analytical. You better be both.

《情緒管理十二講》

巴黎雷歐 著

原書名：Paris gold Key（巴黎金鑰匙）

Léo Paris 巴黎雷歐 著

Paris2019

內(nèi)容簡介

這是一本從非常別致的角度解析情緒管理的著作，是從作者的系列心理學(xué)講座中挑選出來的。巴黎雷歐（李由、任由之）的系列心理學(xué)講座，在法國、美國青年中頗受歡迎，特試譯為中文版本。

巴黎雷歐著有《跨國公司內(nèi)部談判效益論析》（法文版）《法國現(xiàn)代書畫藝術(shù)評論》（英文版3卷）和《雷歐帶你認識法國》《雷歐帶你認識巴黎》等書籍。

由于巴黎雷歐現(xiàn)系巴黎遠東文化藝術(shù)協(xié)會負責人，巴黎遠東藝術(shù)館、巴黎雷歐珍寶館和多種媒體及版權(quán)交易機構(gòu)負責人，非常繁忙，所以此譯本尚未得巴黎雷歐先生審閱，特此說明。

情緒管理十二講LéoParis –巴黎雷歐 目錄

（中文譯本未經(jīng)巴黎雷歐審閱）

第一講 輕松成功，有秘訣嗎？

第二講 給你的“自律”放個假

第三講 決策，可能是偽裝的逃避

第四講 成功的關(guān)鍵在于效率

第五講 毒性人格，為何不能正常詮釋

第六講 情感脫節(jié)，一個危險的癥狀

第七講 情緒化，恰恰是因為缺乏感性

第八講 強烈感覺與自我意識

第九講 治愈厭倦，參與周圍的環(huán)境

第十講 不要讓你喜歡的東西殺死你

第十一講 社交障礙治療——消除隔離

第十二講 樂趣和成功之間的差距

Paris gold Key

巴黎金鑰匙

Léo Paris

Catalog

Catalog

Key to success with ease

Give your poor self-discipline a break

Decision-making, a highly disguised escape

Key to success with efficiency

Toxic personality, why some people are impossible to reason with

Disconnected of one’s emotion, the real symptoms

One is extremely moody because he is NOT emotional

Open mindedness and self-awareness

Cure to boredom, engage the environment around you

DON’T find something that you love and let it kill you

Social accessibility, one major cure for social isolation

The gap between having fun and being successful

著者簡介

巴黎雷歐（Léo Paris），曾用名李由，任由之，巴黎大學(xué)國際經(jīng)濟研究生畢業(yè)，曾任通用電氣公司歐亞總部經(jīng)理及新浪歐洲財經(jīng)特邀記者，著有《晨曦集》《在成長》《跨國公司內(nèi)部談判》（法）《情緒管理十二講》（法）《遠東文化藝術(shù)》（法）《巴黎雷歐藝術(shù)評論》（法，3卷）《簡明國際商務(wù)》（考研輔導(dǎo)用書）《國際談判哲學(xué)》（法）《國際談判實務(wù)》（華）等。

巴黎雷歐